Parents' Pressure

Parents' Pressure
Empathy

Continuing "Paper Town" by John Green, I realized that Margo's parents sort of expect her to be an ideal student. Based on the story, she disappears after the night she had completed a series of revengeful attacks with Quentin Jacobsen. Margo's parents went crazy after discovering that she is gone (even though this was her 5th time). They made sure that Margo goes to a good college, which is the last time she would even want to talk about. I suppose that her parents seem to have more expectations on her school performance, rather than care about how she truly feels. I feel that if I were to be in her parents' shoes, then instead of being mad at her, I would learn to understand why she chose to leave.

A routine is something that is done on a daily basis. I feel that Margo is stressed from the routine her parents want her to have. Getting good grades, being popular, and going to a great college means nothing to her. I can tell that it's not the life she wants. That same routine gave her no freedom. If I were to be in her parents shoes, I would have allowed her to follow her dreams. Furthermore, she is a grown adult now. She can live without them. "The town was paper, but the memories were not," Quentin had said. Parents who really want the best of their kids should permit them to create their own wonderful memories and let them be who they want to be. Those who only pressures their children are selfish creatures who cares only about themselves. Quentin had said, "what a treacherous thing to believe that a person is more than a person." Someone who you see as popular may just be someone like you in reality. Margo's parents has to understand that she is a human too. She also want to have a social life without the pressure from them. And to sum up, I believe that i would have tried to learn and comprehend why she chose to leave home instead of being grumpy at her disappearance since that won't solve any problems.

In addition, I guess rebelling is her way of telling her parents what she wants to do, to live in a word where she doesn't have to be what her parents expect her to be. She wants to tell them that she also have a world to chase, a dream to follow, a life to maintain. Of course grades are also essential, but you can still allow some freedom for her to have. Margo's parents doesn't seem to show any interest with what she is doing on a regular basis, except when it involves with her disappearing. They gave no concerns for what she desires. If I were to be her parents, then I would talk to her with diplomacy. And that's not something that is similar to what they had done for now.

In brief, I think her parents are pushing her to do something that she isn't comfortable in doing. Instead of being peer pressure, it is like parent pressure. In my case, my parents let me off easily. They aren't as strict as Margo's parents and they leave me accountable, making it less likely that I would rebel. Her parents need to set a limit at how much they can mind her life. After all, she is 18 already. She is an adult and so she can take care of herself. She won't learn anything when her parents babysitting her. Therefore, if I'm her parents, then I would have done things differently.

Paper Town: The "Fake" Self

Paper Town
Author's Intrusion

How can you tell between something real and something fake? I've began to read John Green's "Paper Town" a few days ago, which is about a teenager named Quentin Jacobsen who secretly watches the life of Margo Roth Spiegelman, until the real person climbs into his room and demanded for him to participate in her revengeful plans. The excerpt, "from here, you can't see the rust or the cracked paint or whatever, but you can tell what the place really is. You can see how fake it all is" (57). I think this quote shows a lot about the author's message. Therefore, I believe that the extract shows an author's intrusion.

Firstly, I can tell that it means how nothing is as it seems. Something that could look beautiful may actually be "uglier close up" said Margo, page 57. When you look from far away, everything seems to be simplified. The weaknesses are like hidden by a human's eyes when you look from a distance. But up close, you can see all the imperfections. There are scratches, cracks, and stains. It can't be buried forever. In this case, Quentin, who seems to think he knows Margo really well, is completely surprised to find that she may be more realistic than he had thought she was, after the night he had completed the quest with her. "The rust or the cracked paint or whatever" seems to represent everything in our lives. Anything. Margo was not how Quentin had thought she was. Nothing is as you think. You may live your entire life with someone and never understand anything about that person exactly. I suggest that Green wants to tell readers that something that may look beautiful on the outside could just be hidden, to mask the uglier layer underneath. Nothing can be trusted because there isn't anything in the universe that is exactly how you see it as.

Secondly, "you can see how fake it all is" sort of reminds me of the title of the book, "Paper Town". I think John Green is saying that you can't decide that something is what you had imagined by referring that the world is fake like a paper town. No matter how strong you may think the paper-made houses and buildings is on the outside, with a gust of wind, the entire place could easily collapse onto one another. Margo has more struggles than her parents think she has. She, a straight A popular student, is tired of the "college: getting in or not getting in. Trouble: getting in or not getting in. School: getting A's or getting D's. Career: having or not having. House: big or small, owning or renting. Money: having or not having" (33). Humans are difficult to understand because we're not animals. We can't be "explained" by someone else. You can't say how someone is something else without being them. Margo said, "those streets that turn in on themselves, all the houses that we built to fall apart" (57). Nothing is how you had thought it was. Overall, I assume that the author has intruded into Margo's voice to explain to readers that there will be times when you just won't "get it" because something once described as perfect may not also be the same forever.

Lastly, I feel that the John Green, a very influential author, has intruded into the story to give people a message. It's like saying how you can't trust something as how it is. People may camouflage themselves to stay in the society in order to get accepted. Someone who you thought you knew very well may actually not be the "real" them. That's why everything is fake. In other words, I believe that John Green has the intention to make people realize that even though we may think that we can see through people in our lives, sometimes it may just be a camouflage of their true self.

The Mask

The Mask 

Symbol & Theme

Everyone has something they want to change in their lives. No one is always satisfied with everything. Sarah's "What Happened to Goodbye", is about how Mclean Sweet chooses to become someone else every time she and her dad move to a new town. She is capable of casually becoming anything from a cheer leader to the school's president and just "shred her skin" after she moves to another place. I believe that every different identities she had made represents how she wants to leave her past behind because she can't accept who she originally is, even though she should be honest and accept what she is.

Whether it's Liz, Eliza, Lizbet, or Beth, they are all just one person. And that is Mclean. She creates a new profile on Ume.com (similar to facebook) every time she moves to someplace new. I think that those profiles symbolize changes for a new self so that she can forgot her old past. But what happens is that, “we make such messes in this life, both accidently and on purpose. But wiping the surface clean doesn't really make anything any neater. It just masks what is below. It's only when you really dig down deep, go underground, that you can see who you really are," she said. I think those identities are like the mess that she had left behind because she abandons everything behind, so that she can start over to perfect her life furthermore. "Accepting all the good and bad about someone. It's a great thing to aspire to. The hard part is actually doing it," she had also said. And that is true because you should be your true-self and accept your flaws, because no one's life is as pure and clear as crystals and so you're in good company.

I suppose that she chose to create a new character for herself because she is tired of having to deal with her parent's broken marriage and her mom's new life...without her dad. She wants to avoid her old life in order to reinvent herself in a place where no one knows much about her, but "your past is always your past. Even if you forget it, it remembers you.” And the thing is that I feel that it is irresponsible for her to want to escape from her life and other people that had loved her. Her different identities symbolizes change and how she lacks confidence to manage her stress. "I mean, it's impossible to fake anything if you've already seen the other person in a way they'd never choose for you to. You can't go back from that," she said. I feel the same way because you can't be someone you aren't destined to be. You can't just hide your true personality. You have to accept yourself for who you are so that others can do the same. I would encourage her to keep her original self and maintain that way. Just be yourself. All the other identities just makes me realize how she should remain as who she was before, even if it means having to living tirelessly again.

Hence, I believe that instead of pretending to be someone to escape from pain, she should face it honestly without any "make ups" to hide her flaws. Her fake characters seems to show how she wants change desperately, but she's just trying too hard. Therefore, she should accept herself rather than being a "fake" person to face her past.

Think Before You Act: It's too late for regrets

Think Before You Act: It's too late for regrets
Theme

I have began to read the book, "So Much Closer," by Susane Colasanti, which is about a girl named Brooke, who is so obsessed with the kid Scott Abrams that she moved over to New York City after hearing the news of him transferring there. She stubbornly decided that they were meant to be together even though they've never talked more than ten sentences. If there was a limit to admiring idols, then the limit for liking a crush must be justified, because I feel that Brooke had just went over the board. A lot of my disappointments are popping out because of her selfishness. “Every passing minute is another chance to turn it all around.” I feel that Susane may want us to think twice when making decisions.

According to the text, I believe that you should value the importance of something before making a choice that you'll soon regret. I think Brooke is too self-centered because she doesn't care about what others feel. She left her hometown, along with her best friend April, just to follow a guy she hardly knows. And then she went ahead to make new friends, leaving April behind. “You can never completely know anyone, no matter how well you think you do. There will always be some truth about them you don’t ever get to know," she'd said. It's unbelievable how she would rather choose to exchange a friend that has always been by her side since childhood for a dude who is nothing but a piece of shit (not sure if this word should be used). Making right decisions is really important because sometimes it will scar you forever, and it's nothing that can be redone. I suppose that there's nothing you can do but regret. Almost all the people that smoked had wished that they didn't start at first because now, they are suffering just to quit. I can tell that the author wants to say that it's important to take the right actions now to prevent bad ones in the future.

Similarly, I assume that she had also hurt her mother's feelings when moving to New York City. Since Brooke's parents are divorced, It feels that she had picked her dad over her mother. Even though she didn't necessary moved there for her dad, who lives in New York, her mom doesn't know that. "What’s the point of digging up a lot of stuff that’s better off staying buried?...He gave me a reason to leave my whole world behind," she said. And as expected, "...maybe one day you’ll find out their truth. And you’ll wish you never had." There are communication problems that they should work on together, but if Brooke weren't so selfish, then maybe her life won't get so messed up. I suppose that she's the one to blame for all the troubles. If she would have made judgments that were based on the significance of the things in her life she might not regret too much. "Did I really think that everything would turn out the way I hoped it would? Life doesn’t work that way." Of course, and that's why you should always put others in consideration when doing something that may harm them--physically and emotionally.

I can tell that Susane wants to tell us that making appropriate decisions are an essential part of life. It's easier to make things right the first time around then to correct your mistake because like eraser marks, things would never go back the way you had before. This is why you should think twice before doing something. "No one can be everything you want them to be, " and so you have to count on yourself to create the life you want. The life that best suits you. You should careful with what you are doing because you'll never know when will that become a memory of yours that you will remember forever.

The Unseen Force; The Antagonist

The Protagonist’s Inner Voice

(The Antagonist)

Everyone has an inner voice inside of themselves that usually provide advices in what you should do. There are always superior and dreadful ones. While I was reading the book, “Waiting for You,” by Susane Colasanti, I’ve became aware of the fact that Marisa, the main heroine of the story, is facing many obstacles because of a certain antagonist that is trying to combat her life. It is an unseen force that has prevented her from moving forward. I believe that the force must be Marisa’s anxiety disorder because of the impact it gives in her already-messed up life.

Narrowing this down from the start of the story, for instance, Marisa has been avoiding her recent pressure such as dealing with her divorcing parents and a buddy who has too much time to flirt with unidentified guys on the internet. Because of this, she learns to pretend that everything is all fine, instead of putting an effort to overcome her issues. “There are some things I can't control, & that's just the way it is,” she had mentioned before. I believe that her anxiety is the antagonist averting her to push forward, to actually manage her stress. Her distress always interferes with her ability to lead a normal life. Marisa assumes that there is nothing better she can do to improve her life, when she’s not even trying. She is constantly overwhelming herself with problems and becomes anxious because she can’t find a solution for it. And so she tries to make it disappear by forgetting about it, but that only works temporarily. You’ll still have to go back to it another time.  It’s like a mess that you bury under a pile of clothes that will eventually reveal another time. Things don’t get better if you don’t do anything, obviously. Nothing is fixed. I feel that it is important for you to deal with what you have, instead of delay everything behind because you are unwilling to clear the jumble.

Besides, Marisa’s anxiety disorder forces her to think negatively about herself. I can tell that she has low self-esteem when she said, “I want to be the kind of person who can do that. Move on and forgive people and be healthy and happy. It seems like an easy thing to do in my head. But it's not so easy when you try it in real life.” And the thing is, it is significant for her to confront that adversary inside of her. She had assumed. “Things fall apart, even when you think they're stronger than anything you could ever imagine,” and so trauma is nothing, unless you don’t deal with it. I have come to understand that in most cases, it is best to overcome your problems instead of just acting as if it is nonexistent because they won’t ever literally vanish and evaporate in the air.

Consequently, by the finish of the story she point out. “I mean, maybe under the surface, somewhere that's hard to see, I've known it had to end for a long time. I just never thought I'd be the one to end it,” she had stated. Marisa’s anxiety, being her main obstacle and rival, should be stopped by herself.  After all, she had been quite depressing the year before her intense sophomore year, and so it was hard to get back up from where she had fell. But it is possible with that thin streak of light remaining. “There's a quote I heard a long time ago, something my Dad told me. It’s about how you're like a lighthouse, always searching far into the distance. But the thing you're looking for is usually close to you and always has been. That's why you have to look within yourself to find answers instead of searching beyond,” she declared. You should trust yourself to solve your problems instead of immediately stuffing them under your pillows. Indeed, by the end, she was able to stop the confliction between her life and her social anxiety disorders. By and large, her way of managing stress at first has become Marisa’s biggest opponent of her days.

Hence, the inner voice inside Marisa’s mind is the antagonist that is blocking her from moving further because she is avoiding what needs to be cautioned. That voice is always telling her to disregard the stress that needs to be handled properly. It’s kind of like Max from Freak the Might, for the reason that he had been trying to put her mother’s death away from his mind, instead of fighting over it because he was afraid of remembering the past. The author felt that you can remember anything, whether it happened or not. Susane, the author of this book said, “Even in a bad situation, there's always a positive side. Even if you can't see it yet.”  I would rather be weird but elated than being all normal but despondent.  Briefly, I suppose that Marisa’s coward way of life is hindering her from progressing.

The Purpose of An Eliminated P.O.V

The Loss of Innocent

Whose perspective is missing?

As I am approaching to the end of "Feeds", by M.T. Anderson, I've noticed another reason for the perspective the author has chosen. Titus, whose life is controlled by mechanism, is going through a stage of "evolution". I believe that the author has purposely excluded the voice of Violet, who is his girlfriend, because of their differences in the social classes. Overall, it seems to me that Violet's perspective has been limited because of the author's message.

Based on the text, I infer that M.T. has chosen to eliminate her point of view in order to let Titus go on a loss of innocent journey. For example, he had matured a lot from the beginning of the story because of Violet. She was born from a poor family and could not afford many things the other ones could. As a result, she is more independent and smart than the average humans that only rely on "feeds", these mechanical brains, to work from them. Even after Violet has a feed, she never gave up from her usual life, still continuing to read and write, unlike the other ones. I feel that M.T. had excluded her point of view to make Titus realize how he had always taken things for granted. Indeed, he had started to mature a bit after knowing her situation. The confusing thing is, I think that it is common for people to feel that it is mandatory for them to have what they have because they have it, and because of this, they don't know how it feels to be the opposite. I infer that the author's purpose to limited Violet's voice is to allow readers to know how the rich people understands the situation and have Titus go on a loss of innocent journey.

Second off the bat, with Violet's point of view excluded, it gives a big impact to the story. Like as mentioned before, not only did Titus grew up, but the maturity of us, as cautious readers, have also been raised. I did not know that because Violet is poor, it made her independent as an individual. She does not rely on much things because she's the "stick" that she can hold on to. The author slowly revealed the idea that you shouldn't take things for granted by applying Violet's point of view here and there. At first, all I've noticed about the story is Titus's almost-perfect life. Going to the moon, hanging out with friends, going to the club, were all pretty good experiences. This kind of life that makes me jealous of, was more stand out than the others. The effect was that it made me think that this was what happened to everyone in the story every single day, until Violet came along. I've came to believe that the author was giving us this outstanding, flawless life in the beginning, to compare it with a complete opposite one to make us realize the difference and its impact.

To sum it up, Violet's point of view has been excluded it order to give this image of perfection, making Titus mature from his thoughts. Now that I think about it, it is like writing a debate or a speech. Comparisons are made in order to emphasize and deepen your points. W.T. had purposely made Titus's perspective stand out and eliminated Violet's, because he want him to grow up from the wide-innocent-eyes character. He had us thinking, to value things more. Therefore, I believe that her outlook of the story has been intentionally taken out.

Living in a Perfect World

Blog Post #5
Living in a Perfect World: What hard things occur in text?

Not long ago, I've started to read the book, "Feed", written by M. T. Anderson. The story revolves around a boy named Titus in a futuristic world. It is the world where technologies are huge in your basic living. With the "computers" called feeds implanted into human's brain, they no longer have to think for themselves. This may seem incredible if we actually have this type of technologies in our current life. Imagine no more schools, no more worries, and no more needs to make decisions? Life would be awesome if only we have these feeds to control our daily life. But, really? It is really okay? If I were to think more realistically, I would have to admit. I don't want to be fully controlled by machines yet.

First thing's first. Titus and his friends had always relied on their feeds to do the work for them. I feel that these are some of the hard things the characters are facing. A life without feeds to them means a life without a brain to us. For example, when Titus mentioned, "you write? With a pen?...I can read. A little. I kind of protested in the school. On the grounds that the silent 'E' is stupid," I was pretty surprised at the fact that a teenager could be so...dumb. I believe that the author wanted to tell us how you shouldn't not be so irresponsible and count only on machines to maintain a life. I can tell that it's unfair because you should work for want you get.

Second of all, people in his world basically can get anything they want with just the tips of their fingers, actually, that's not even needed. Just command your brain. There are no such things as miracle. If you want something in particular, all you have to do is to desire for it. But when hackers hacked into their feeds, their life was basically disconnected from all the technologies that they had access to before. I feel that people are just getting more lazier this way because of their lack of doing something. Everyone wants to live in a perfect world but there are no such things in reality. To be flawless is impossible. Feeds are useful but in another way, it is also harmful. It has impacted people's growth of intelligence and had increased their laziness. Anderson feels the need to warn us that you should believe that you can also be successful without relying on other factors. I agree with this also because "some people dream of success while others wake up and work hard for it."

Therefore, I strongly believe that you shouldn't count on something to do the work that you are capable of doing. Failures and mistakes only increase your motivation. I can related to Titus because I can't live my life without the accessibility to internet. It is like if we are stuck with something, all we have to do is search it up. However, without the existence of internet, I would just be a little helpless sheep wandering to elsewhere without a goal. To sum it up, I think we should always using determination and courage to get the things we want, and not count on a device to guide our life.

The "Before" and "After" Image

Mockingbird  
Blog Post #4

As I was reading the book, Mockingbird, by Kathryn Erskine, I've realized how much the word "empathy" was mentioned. The main heroin Caitlin, is a ten-year old fifth grader with Asperger's syndrome who could not make sense of anything, especially after the death of her beloved brother, Devon. Her straight forward personality had cost her a lot. She is forced to be surrounded by only colors of black and white, mix with some shades of gray—the color of loneliness. But, as the storyline proceeds, she seems to discover the beauty in the world. The colors of joy. I think she sort of changed from the beginning to the end. I certainly believe that there has been a huge difference between the Caitlin "before, and the Caitlin "after".

Basically, in the first place, she was a little girl that questions everything—true or not true, churlish or not churlish. I understand that this is because of the fact that she does not quite understand the emotions of people—the main thing that classifies human beings. She was the lonely person who likes to suck on her sleeves. “Empathy isn't as hard as it sounds because people have a lot of the same feelings. And it helps to understand other people because then you can actually care about them sometimes. And help them. And have a friend,” said Mrs. Brook, the school counselor. Caitlin's way of trying to be nice to someone is pretty strange. She wanted to make a girl, Rachel, who's face was full of bruises, to feel less embarrassed by putting her chair in the corner, thinking that this way, no one can see her face and that she can finally hide from everyone else. However, I feel this only makes Rachel feel that she wanted to get rid of her by putting her in the corner since her back was to the face of everybody else.

At the beginning of the story, I can tell that Caitlin's life was so emotionless because she didn't quite understand how to put herself into someone's else shoe. She doesn't know how to care for someone else. That's why she lacks friends. Friendship is something absolutely required for a person. I believe that no one can be on the top of the world without a stick to rely on. "You step out of your own shoes and put on someone else's because you're trying to BE that person for a moment," says Mrs. Brook. This is what Caitlin should do. And that's what she did.

Without a question mark, I can tell the changes applied to her slowly as she learned to feel for someone. She had approached her first step. It seems to be that she is starting to understand the hardships her father is facing and so she tried to help him get over the day they fell apart (when Devon died). As it gets towards the end of the book, she learned the meaning of "closure", an often comforting or satisfying sense of finality, and decided, and that's just what they needed to get over Devon's death. While she was helping his father, I figured that she was also rescuing herself from the world of darkness. She was also wanting to actually make friends. No longer was she the girl in the corner all by herself. I realized that Caitlin was changing her life using her own hands for a better situation. She was becoming to realize who she is, what defines her, and what is feelings. Clearly, she had changed from the beginning to the end.

Indeed, transforming from one thing to another is difficult. It's not easily to overcome a barrier that had locked you in from the outside world, that had disconnected you from the society. That describes Caitlin perfectly. She was able to learn the importance of friendship to overcome herself and understand how to feel what others felt. I can relate to her since being alone is not an easy task. It is like talking to a wall. It is a challenge for me because friends are one of the main "materials" that keep you strong. I think Caitlin is just troubled because of the sudden changes in her life. Overall, I feel that Caitlin had matured a lot throughout the book and really grow up from it.

Re-Adjusting Our Daily Lives

Author’s Intrusion

Blog Post #3

As I was anxiously flipping through the pages of Lock and Key written by Sarah Dessen, my eyes drifted to this one paragraph in the middle of nowhere that randomly, is about fishes. “You will need to acclimate them slowly…put the bags in the water for about fifteen minutes so they can get adjusted to the temperature. Then open the bags and let a little bit of your pond water in to mix with what they’re in. Give it another fifteen minutes or so, and then you let them go.” (p174) This simple, yet interesting line (at least to me), made me realize a bigger idea hidden within the book.  You’re probably confused by right as I was before, thinking. “Fishes—how interesting."  Clearly, I‘ve realized a bigger theme that binds in with the plainness and simplicity in this paragraph. 

First of all, this quote reminds me of Ruby’s situation. She had been living by herself illegally under 18, without anyone to rely on, because of the disappearance of her mother.  After the secret has been discovered by the landlords, moreover, the school, she was forced to live with her sister, Cora, unwillingly, in a gorgeous mansion-like dream house. She was scared to accept the help of others and is living life gloomily. Ruby didn’t exactly like that place at first. It was just too distinct from her past, original life. She even tried to escape by climbing the fence. “Acclimate” from the excerpt means to adapt, to familiarize, so basically, this makes me think that Sarah Dessen wanted to tell us readers that no one can fully fit in, in a new place right away. 

Besides that, it takes time for people to get use to it, to adjust to the unfamiliar surrounding. Furthermore, I can’t transfer to a foreign school and automatically feel comfortable around my classmates either. It’s normal for people.  The quote makes total sense. No doubt, you will need to acclimate them slowly. Ruby just needed to give up her tough past. It’s not worth it. In general, I feel that the author wanted to tell us that being in a new environment isn’t something bad.  The key is to slowly let them feel adjusted to it…”and then let them go”.

 Other than that, "...let a little bit of your pond water in to mix with what they’re in" from the text is another intrusion from the author, in which she is trying to tell you that you will need something you can relate to when moving to a new place, so that you can feel connected. This makes you feel more mutual to the unfamiliar people. This way, you don't feel completely foreign and off-topic.

 

Additionally, the extract referred to a fish. I feel that it sort of symbolizes humans. When fishes leave their tanks to live in a new location, they usually start of uneasily, their faces popping up, and then disappearing. Generally, they will do fine and get use to their new place, unless herons come out of nowhere and attack them. It is the same as for any average people. Although having a real human adapt to their new atmosphere certainly takes longer than just 30 minutes, as stated in the text, you will still eventually get over their old past and live in the present. Nobody should stay in the fantasy from their memory. That’s like ancient history. You just got to move on.  Think about death. You have to learn to accept it, not let the scar follow you around.  Fishes are like a role model of humans. They are constantly being moved and played, like toys. Their lives are short, but they never gave up.  Ruby shouldn’t live life gloomily anymore.  I believe that this excerpt clearly describes a fish, but more importantly, also makes me think of people in general and how they social.

In final consideration, I definitely feel that this simple quote is like a life lesson that teaches not just Ruby, but people how you shouldn’t escape from reality just because you don’t feel comfortable with something. You have to give it some time. Nothing can automatically go the way you want. It’s impossible—unless you’re out of the ordinary, of course. In other words, fishes are like humans. It’s a big shock to their system, leaving the tank, but they usually do fine in the end. Lastly, Sarah Dessen uses this voice to remind us about how everyone in a new environment starts off rough, going up the cliff, but then they can still be able to survive as they slide down from it. Being social really makes a big difference. It’s not hard, but time is the most essential factor. Isn’t this the same for you too?

Being More than Just “Friends”

Question #7

& Connecting Annotations:

p48  “Freak on Max’s shoulder, connected and together. They kind of rely on one another.”

p77  “With the teacher just helplessly staring as classmates teases him, Freak sort of acts like his mother. It’s him protecting Max, and Max being protected.”

P131 “Freak declaring “battle” with Killer Kane is pretty much like a midget fighting a giant or a baby verses an adult. Even after knowing this, Freak still dares to act against him in such way.”

What really keeps a newly-born friendship, steady? After reading Freak the Mighty, by Rodman Philbrick, I paused to think as I connect these previously scattered annotations together. The story revolves around Max, who was forced to learn to be alone until Kevin, also known as Freak, brightens his whole life. It seems to be more difficult to have a reliable and meaningful friendship then I had thought it was. It takes more effort than just chatting together and enjoying the times of your life with each other. You may be living your entire life looking for such friend, but not find anything. It takes a lot of trust to maintain this connection. Max and Freak value it more than anybody else. The annotations proved that they care for each other like family members . This type of friendship is quite limited, and I strongly feel that Philbrick had a point to back up through their relationship.

Purposely, I strongly believe that Philbrick is trying to tell us readers that if you are true friends with someone, then you should always watch their backs. Be their first supporters, be there for one another. It’s the requirements. The unchangeable theory. If you fail to complete that task, then I guess they can't really be the "family" type of friends. Also, Philbrick wanted to tell people how two are better than one. You feel more powerful with more people. One can help the other overcome their obstacles. I can tell that the author is trying to say that in order to have a life giving friendship, you must be daring enough to risk your own life for that other person.

These similar annotations mention about Max and Kevin supporting and helping one another. You can say that they act as sticks to help guide both sides. For example, when Freak declared at Killer Kane, “put your hands up, villain!”…"I’m warning you," he was trying to rescue Max from that "kidnapper” who was bigger than triple his size. He was daring and has the guts to do anything he can to save his best friend, even if he had to risk his life. Nothing is risk-free. He was not scared to face the future challenges, because they are watching each others' backs. This idea is repeated throughout the book, making me think that trusting and supporting a friend just for that purpose is an important theme throughout the whole story. You feel stronger when you have someone by your side because you know you’re not alone. They stay by your side so that you don’t feel weak.

Having a steady relationship with someone and leaving your lives in their hands requires a lot of courage. This can help maintain the trusty connection needed between one other. “Order!”…”Order in the court! Let justice be heard!” Freak also said in order to stop the classmates from humiliating Max. The teachers dealt with the problem with silence, but instead, Freak stuck up for him. Isn’t this what friends are for? The annotations basically has this sort of idea mixed in it, since it's about friends backing up for each other.

I’ve also realized that if I were to be a character in this book, I think I would probably be Gram. She’s more like the shapeshifter of the story, who is uncertain of her opinions on Max. Sometimes, she would think about Max as the grandson she had loved. Sometimes, she’s terrified at Max and how he’s becoming to look more like his dad who had murdered his own wife. It’s complicated. I’m pretty doubtful when making decisions too. I can’t make up my mind either. She isn’t good or bad. Gram and I are quite similar since I lack certainty. If I were to be in her shoes, I would probably be afraid of Max more than love him, because generally, I would only look at the facts scattered on the outside. After all, I can’t “read” people’s minds in real life, so I am able to understand her situation. It's not her fault. She felt guilty too. That's life.

Thinking back now, when my eyes shifted to the title, Freak the Mighty, I felt that this has to be some sort of horror mixed with mystery type of book. But now, I feel that the title kind of symbolizes the closeness of their friendship and how they needed each other so much that they just “had” to combine into one new person. With Max doing the walking and Freak doing the brain work, they are invincible. Without one another, they would be no one. No body. Freak the Mighty won't exist. They accepted each others' weaknesses to create their new self. This reminds me of the time when people asked for Freak’s name. He would say, “Sometimes I am Kevin. Sometimes I’m more than Kevin.” He and Max together is Freak the Mighty. It is the connection that ties both of them together.

Overall, Philbrick made me notice the importance of friendship and how it can affect someone so much. This type of friendship can only be maintained if both sides are equality supporting each other. When you’re happy, you want to share the news with them. When you’re sad, you want them to comfort you. When you’re mad, you want them to listen to your complaints. It’s mandatory for true friends to automatically be by your side. How can you live without a friend to rely on?

Confident --to be, or not to be

Freak the Mighty

By Rodman Philbrick

Maxwell Kane is someone who automatically thinks he is a no-brainer. Except he’s not. Nobody really is. It’s kind of like the negative emotion that has been building up from his heart, his soul. It is that alien hacking into his brain system, aiming straight to invade his mind. They control that part of him to convince him that everything is like mission impossible. And no, I’m not being overly dramatic or crazy like a sci-fi fan or anything. Max’s mind is the thing that stops him from trying. He was resisting to change. He did not want to change. It’s like Max had been living his life as a loner, and had liked it that way, until Freak came along and changed the script of his life.

He knew the truth that Max didn’t. “It’s all in your head, Max, everything you can remember,” he had said. He just knew that Max was smarter than he thinks. He tried to stop Max  from thinking,“me in the smart class? No way.” It is his doubtful personality that had avoided him from trying hard.

It is like how Max always hides his confidence with “makeup“, to cover his weakness up. All Max does is lock himself in the down under, in his own world, escaping from the society. That’s just not right. He always says, “I never had a brain until Freak came along...” Sure, but what does that mean? Is he going to rely on Freak forever? He has his own brain, just that he never believed it existed with all of his negative thoughts processing inside his head. Ugh, I mean no one can actually live without a brain anyways...

It just occurs to me that courage is something required for an heroin, and yet, it’s no good if he is just going through the coward’s path, spending his life in the darkness, just because he is frightened. If Max is truly the heroin, he must overcome his shadows --Killer Kane.

So, I’m thinking back when David Kane, his father, “captured” him and locked him up in the abandoned buildings. All Max says is, “yes, sir” and “no, sir” every time his father demands for an answer with a question. I’m thinking, “is this the reaction a human is suppose to give when your life is being threatened?” That way of dealing with a situation is so weakling-like. Max did not do anything at first to defend or attack. He just went along with everything, as if this was just part of his daily life, like he had already given up on the battle, before it even begin. He was lacking certainty, insecure, and did not do anything to change his fate…until Loretta gets strangled by Killer Kane.

And then it seems like Max had been shot with a power-up transformation gun. He defended and tried to save the innocents. He tried to fight back, even with his hands numbed. Even when he thinks that attacking him was just the same as trying to kill a dinosaur. He kind of learned that he should have faith in himself. It is the confidence gained that had made him fight so bravely, so wisely. It’s like superman comes and saves the day!…except, not really.

It’s strange how you can feel so confident one second, and then become the opposite, the next second. I remember the feeling I had, when my parents praised me for my efforts in doing something smart. They gave me the motivation to work harder. They made me more hopeful. It’s feels good for once to know that I’m useful, that confidence you have when you feel that you’re capable of doing something that is pleasurable. 

Max, in this case, just needed that type of motivation to feel faithful in himself. Lord, it’s awkward how something so small can affect people so much. It’s only normal to have more self-esteem inside of you, to be proud of being who you are, and not that fake identity you’ve created to hide your lack of assurance.